It's critical that you find enough time in your schedule to prepare your finances for post-divorce life. Doing so now will save you a lot of time and hassle in the future.
Here are three things to do:
If you don't prepare your finances for post-divorce life, you're making more work for yourself in the future. And that's not what you want during uncertain times.
By taking the above steps and keeping close track of your financial situation as you move through divorce, you minimize the risk of a mistake costing you time and money, while also adding stress to your life.
]]>We realize that this will take work, but you've got to think ahead of time about what assets you can handle. One thing to remember is that you'll only have your income to count on so some assets might put too much pressure on your budget because of the cost of them. Setting your budget in place before you go into the negotiations can help you to know what you'll be able to afford and what you might need to bypass as you compromise with your ex.
Another consideration for the process is that the debts will likely have to be split unless there's a plan in place to sell assets to pay off debts. If it's possible to sell things off to pay down debt, this may be preferable so that neither person has to worry about paying for those or how they might be impacted if the other person doesn't pay for them.
In Oregon, property division settlements must be equitable. They won't necessarily be equal, so that shouldn't be your goal. We can help you to explore the possibilities so that you know what may happen. We can work to protect your interests throughout the process.
]]>The child support order will likely dictate how this is split. There are several ways that might be managed. One option is for each parent to be assigned a percentage of these expenses. Another is that one parent be responsible for a specific dollar amount and then the other parent covers the balance.
Typically, the parent who is with the child when they incur the uninsured cost will pay for the bill. They will then need to be reimbursed for the expense in some way. This might be handled immediately, but some orders for support stipulate monthly or quarterly settlements for these expenses.
One factor that comes into the picture for some of these expenses is that they might not be deemed necessary or reasonable. If there is something that might be considered unreasonable or unnecessary, you should find out if the other parent will willingly split the bill according to the order's terms. If they won't, you may have to turn to the court for an answer. Sometimes, a parent won't have to be responsible for a bill that's for unnecessary or unreasonable care.
If you're unsure about what to do regarding an extraordinary medical expense, your attorney can help you find out what your order stipulates. This might help you to determine how to handle the situation.
]]>There are two primary aspects of these cases that we know are stressful to many clients – child custody and property division. The outcome of these two aspects of the split can have a big impact on your future. We can help you to evaluate the options that you have in both.
The focus of the child custody case must be the children. Even if it's difficult for you, coming up with a parenting plan that's best for the children must be the priority. Neither parent should use this part of the divorce to try to get back at the other one.
The property division aspect of the case can focus on what's best for you. While you're going through this, make sure you're considering things from a practical standpoint. Your emotions might come into the picture, but thinking solely about them may lead you to make decisions that aren't in your best interests.
We know that you might have some questions about what's possible what might happen. We're here to answer those and to make sure that your rights are protected throughout the legal aspects of the end of the marriage.
]]>One of the most important things to do in these cases is to ensure that both parents have parenting time. This is the chance to build the relationship with your child and to have an influence on how they're being raised. You'll probably have considerably less time with them now than what you had in the past, so you need to focus on making it quality time.
Another thing to consider is who will make decisions for the kids. Think about things like medical care, religion and schooling. Will both parents have an equal say in these or will one hold more of the power in a certain area? Outlining this in the child custody order lets everyone know what responsibilities they hold.
The rules for communication must also be set in this parenting plan. Ideally, you and your ex will be able to communicate freely about the children, but there should be an expectation of respect. Remember that you don't ever need to use a child as a messenger. Using monitored communication, such as a parenting communication app, may help if things between you and your ex are still contentious and prone to anger.
No matter what you and your ex work out, the terms should be in the child custody order. If there is ever a disagreement, you can turn to that document to find the solution.
]]>One of the most important things that you can do in these cases is ensure that you remain respectful. It's all too easy to get caught up in the negative thoughts that led to the divorce, but doing this can make things much more difficult. The court will likely frown on badmouthing from either party and there is a chance that this could impact the outcome of the divorce.
Remaining respectful of each other is especially important if you share children. You're going to have a long co-parenting relationship, so starting it off right will benefit everyone. Doing this also helps your children to see that it's possible to work with people even if you don't always see eye-to-eye.
When you embark on the divorce, make sure that you think carefully about each option you have. The goal of the split is for you to walk away with the best settlement possible. You'll have to determine what aspects of the split are worth standing your ground over and which ones aren't worth the energy. Share your goals with your divorce team so you can ensure everyone is on the same page about the direction of your case.
]]>Most people feel a loss of companionship when a marriage is over. You're probably accustomed to having someone home when you get back from a trying day at work. Once you divorce, you won't have that other adult in the picture to talk things over with when you get home.
You may realize that you aren't going to have your children as often after the divorce. This is hard for parents to accept, but it is important to have a positive attitude about this because the children deserve to have a relationship with both parents. Instead of focusing on how hard this is for any of you, try to make good use of the time you do have together.
The financial loss is another one that some people don't plan for. Even if you can live off of your income, you might have subconsciously appreciated the fact that your spouse also had an income that you could count on if something happened to you.
You may also lose friends because of the end of the marriage. This isn't uncommon, but it can be hard to handle when you've already lost so much. You may need to find activities you enjoy so you can start to build a new friend base.
As much as you can, try to focus more on the practical side of decisions you have to make when you divorce. You do need to address the emotional aspects of the situation, but don't let those dictate your actions with the legal side of the split.
]]>One of the most important things to do is to take care of yourself. You can't care for your kids or make decisions in your best interests if you aren't in the best place possible. Eating a healthy diet, getting some exercise and taking time to rest are beneficial. Your children can see you taking care of yourself and look up to you as a role model.
Another thing to do is to try to remain positive. Make a note of what you're thankful for so that you can refer to that when you start to find yourself slipping down a negative slope. You may also challenge yourself to write a few things each day, so your list grows on a regular basis.
Getting the parenting plan set up in a way that's best for the children is also beneficial. Knowing when they will be with you enables you to make plans with them. You can also plan for your self-care during the time when your kids are with your ex.
Finally, focusing on having respectful communication with your ex can help you considerably. Being able to discuss difficult matters without having to worry about constant battles can reduce the stress associated with the situation. It can make it much easier to work through child custody decisions in a way that puts the child's interests first.
]]>Some people may phone the other spouse at work or even go to their workplace and make accusations or start a fight. This could start to affect the other spouse's ability to work and their standing among professional colleagues. While it may seem like the other spouse deserves it, people should keep in mind that this could also affect the spouse's earning potential and in turn what happens with property division.
When it comes to determining child custody, a court makes a decision that is in the best interests of the child. A parent who has frequent outbursts in court or who is haranguing the other parent may be judged as a poor choice for primary custody. Even a rare outburst can look bad to a judge. People should also avoid getting into arguments with a spouse over social media.
Divorce does not always mean litigation, but dealing with emotions can be one of the most difficult aspects of the entire process. A person who is upset or who feels guilty about the divorce may cause the proceedings to drag on or may ask for too little in an effort to get it over with quickly. It may be best to discuss strategy and what the person expects from property division and child custody with an attorney before participating in a negotiation. The attorney may also assist in conducting negotiations.
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