Daniel J. Lounsbury Attorney at Law Willamette Valley Legal
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How can you help your children during the divorce process?

 

Although we hear a lot about how difficult divorce is on a child, we don’t often hear about the stories where children thrive despite the fact that their parents went through divorce. There are many of these stories out there, and sharing them would definitely give a lot of parents hope. The truth of the matter is there are a lot of things parents can do to make the process easier for their kids.

For instance, it’s important that you communicate with your children about the divorce process. You and your ex-spouse do not have to go into detail about it – in fact, it’s best that you don’t – but kids do need to understand the basics of why you have decided to not be together, and they should also understand that it is in no way their fault.

 

It can be really helpful to get your kids into counseling during the process. Although parents may think that talking with their children is enough, your child may not be able to fully express him or herself, especially if they feel like they are taking sides. On that note, make sure you keep your negative emotions from affecting the child’s relationship with his or her other parent. Remember, just because you have sour feelings about your ex, doesn’t mean your child should. Your child should feel guilt-free about spending time with the other parent.

Last but not least, remember that your child may act out during and even after the divorce process. Be understanding and help them cope with the changes. Things like creating new traditions can help children get more comfortable with having to split time between two parents. It may take a little extra effort to make sure your kids feel secure during the divorce process, but it will definitely be worth the effort in the long run. 

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